Pocantico Hills CSD

In the second in a series of programs for parents, Joseph McGrath presented a virtual session “Managing Your Child’s Devices,” to help parents manage in this new era of screens.

The burning question among many parents, including Mr. McGrath who has two children one currently at Pocantico, is how to limit screen time.

The simple answer he said, “bubble wrap your kid.”

Not very practical, he admitted. However, while there may not be a perfect answer he shared practical things parents can do to help themselves and their screen-obsessed child.

He presented a character to parents in the session, “the child lawyer” who argues why they should have a device—not surprisingly the child says “they are bored,” “they will learn more with one,” or “they want to stay close with their friends” and the age old “why are you so mean” when they are denied.

“You need to consider what decisions need to be made and why,” Mr. McGrath, an educational technology director and member of the Pocantico Board of Education, said. However, parents also need to be careful what they tell their children, if they are told they can get a phone at age 13, they will demand one for their 13^th birthday.

Mr. McGrath strongly encouraged parents to use media controls on devices. The negatives of using devices demand it—including an increase in anxiety and depression, gaming, scams, contact with strangers and more.

He encouraged parents to research on their own what media their child may be engaging with and how they can limit it. He said doesthedoggie.com and commonsensemedia.com or connectsafely.com are good websites for this. He also suggested the book “The Anxious Generation” by Jonathan Haidt, which is a popular title.

The one thing parents may not realize is that when they were children, before cell phones and iPads were a thing, their parents worried about them watching too much television. The difference this time with phones and other screens is that they are much more stimulating, and not necessarily in a positive way.

He encouraged parents to set up the safety guidelines on their child’s devices which usually needs to be done manually.

Ultimately, the best safety precaution they can take, as has been said in the past, talk to your children.

“Begin to talk to them at a young age letting them know not everyone they meet online has good intentions,” he said.

Additionally, know your child’s passwords, put rules in place and remind them too that “the internet is forever.”

Talk to them about what they should and should not reveal about themselves online, what strangers can learn from them based on what they are posting, how to spot scams, cyberbullying and how to deescalate conflicts.

“Have multiple conversations,” Mr. McGrath reiterated. “You want them know how to ask for help and when to ask for help.”

In the event that their child makes a mistake online, help them understand that they can come to you.

Resources such as Family Link, Google Calendar, Family Keep and Google Assistant can be helpful. As is disabling auto play on their phone so they are unable to scroll and scroll endlessly and they go from one video to another.

There are paid monthly services that can help set up controls too, but Mr. McGrath warned it can get expensive and he suggested researching and looking at reviews to see if they are worth it.

Click here for a link to Mr. McGraths presentation.